Don't Let the Mean Girls Win
nosey nugget #11
nosey nuggets with Stephanie
Curated gems of inspiration, fresh creative observations, and unexpected insights from the internet. Designed to spark your imagination and brighten your week. Delivered with love every Friday.
What’s On My Mind
Y’all, I gotta talk about this Glennon Doyle/Substack thing for a second. Glennon— a famous writer, podcast lady, very resonant for a lot of folks—made a Substack. She came in, made her presence known, and apparently pissed off a bunch of white ladies who did not want her there. And then… she left.
She let them run her off.
Y’all… what?
I don’t know her like that, and honestly, I wouldn’t even know she had a Substack if it weren’t for the Substack algorithm pushing all this mess into my feed. But it got me thinking. Do white women even want each other to win? Because it’s giving real mean-girl energy out here.
I say all this as a gentle reminder to all people, all genders, all colors:
Never let anyone kick you out of a space you deserve to be in.
None of us own these platforms. Why are folks so mad? You don’t lose your light just because someone else is shining too. Plant your feet, like Beyoncé said: “Best revenge is your paper.”
And now Gary Vaynerchuk is on Substack—y’all gonna run him off too?
Anyway. Do better. And don’t let anyone make you feel like you don’t belong. That’s some insecure bitch behavior. I don’t even know Glennon like that but I’ll go to bat for the principle.
I wish she would have stayed and just made bishes mad. LOL. You have to be a gangster and really just not give AF.
A friend once told me, “Sometimes you’re gonna make people feel small—and that’s their problem, not yours.” I’ll tell you more about that story another day. But this whole Glennon thing made me think—dang… folks will really be pressed just because you’re doing your thing. Threatened. Too much going on for that.
This Week in the Studio
I want to share a spreadsheet that landed in my inbox this week—and it’s one of those things you can’t unsee.
On Friday, May 2, the National Endowment for the Arts (NEA) began issuing grant terminations and withdrawals.
This spreadsheet, compiled by Annie Dorsen, is a living document cataloging which organizations are being impacted. It’s heartbreaking.
So many of these orgs have supported my practice and the work of my friends—plus the folks who work for them. Looking at those numbers had my stomach in knots. Like WTF!!!
Please take a look. If you’re in a position to support any of these groups, this might be the time.
So I don’t know how old y’all are, but remember this track by Another Bad Creation? It came to mind this week, and I had to go back and hit play.
Just a bunch of kids talking about their day on the playground—pure joy. I used to dance to this with my friends like we were in a music video.
🎶 Playground – Another Bad Creation
Also, a PSA for all my creative folks:
Please start backing up your content today.
Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, Substack—whatever you’re using, copy that stuff somewhere else. I use Notion, but Google Docs works. Just somewhere.
Here’s why:
A colleague of mine lost their 85K-member Facebook Group. Gone. Facebook can’t do a thing about it.
Lucy Werner (who has a great Substack) lost everything trying to fix something on the backend.
Moral of the story:
Don’t build your house on rented land. All the thought leaders tell us this—and we’re still not listening, lol.
🛠 Here’s a backup toolkit :
You know what they say—when you stay ready, you don’t have to get ready.
Go ahead and activate that blog tab on your artist website. Or podcast site. Or both.
Even if no one reads it today, you’ll thank yourself later.
Treat it like a creative journal. An archive. A corner of the internet that’s yours. (This is advice I’m telling myself too!)
Damn.
nosey listen!
Tomorrow on Lumpen Radio: Bobbi Meier is in the building!!
If you’re in Chicago, tune in to 105.5 FM or stream online at LumpenRadio.com.
It’s a perfect episode for Mother’s Day weekend, because Bobbi is not only an incredible artist, but also a mama.
We’re talking:
🌀 Grief and the loss of a child
🎨 Balancing humor and sadness in your art
🧸 Playfulness in a post-pandemic world
🗣️ The politics of being a working artist
🏠 Why personal experiences matter more than “professionalism”
✨ Content note: tender reflections on loss. We keep it light, but it’s honest and full of heart.
🗓️ Saturday, May 10 at 2 PM CST
📻 105.5 FM in Chicago or stream online
Word to Live By
“When you stay ready, you don’t have to get ready.”
—Wise Black aunties everywhere
☕ Buy me a coffee if you’re into it—helps keep this thing caffeinated and cute.
Happy Weekend Yall!!!
Stephanie